Hey there, I hope that you’re having a good week. You know I was on facebook yesterday and I came across a friend that I hadn’t seen in years. He has done very well for himself and seems to be a success. I started to think to myself, “Am I a success?” When people talk about me will they smile and say “She did alright,” or will they shake their heads and say "Too bad!" So one might ask, what is success? In our society it seems that success is measured by wealth. Yet statistics prove that most of the nation's wealth is held by a very small percentage of the population. Well that surely is disconcerting. I guess that means that the rest of us can just forget it. So really, what is success?
I think that it all begins very early in life. I can remember seeing commercials with important looking men and women rushing to boardroom meetings. They (successful people) dressed a certain way, drove a certain kind of car and obviously had the money to buy all that they wanted. They worked in the city, lived in the best neighborhoods and hobnobbed with the coolest people. In this land of plenty, success is measured by possessions, by status achieved. One can’t help but feel inadequate when everything that you see points to wealth as the biggest measure of success. I know better, I know that material things don’t last. Yet I still look at what I have (or haven’t) obtained in life thus far, and wonder if I’ve missed the boat.
I remember as a child riding around with my family on Sunday evenings, looking at big expensive houses. Daddy wanted to have the best; and he spent a lot of time figuring out how to get it. We moved into our new house when I was six years old. It wasn't a mansion, but it was a decent house. Looking back, I guess that he filled us with that same desire to have nice things. I just took for granted that one day I’d have a good job, a nice house and a Volvo or a Mercedes. Somehow things haven’t turned out that way. It all started when I didn’t finish college. I made a bad choice; I got off track.
It took me quite a while to get back on track. I ended up pregnant and with no degree after almost 4 yrs. So my life had changed directions. I wasn’t the lawyer or the journalist that I thought I’d be. Over the years I was able to get fairly decent jobs despite the fact that I didn’t have a degree. It’s just that I never had the flexibility working in administrative jobs that allowed me to set my self apart. I guess you could say that I never really found my niche. Administrative jobs tend to be thankless and very routine, and more importantly, low paying. However, I actually was able to buy into a stock plan. We were able to sell some of the stocks and to use the money earned for a home. We finally had a house, our own house. Look out success!
I had finally gotten a house, part of the American Dream. I had decent a car; and oh BTW, I was married to the father of my son. Success, or the wealth that comes with success has always eluded me. Alas, I don’t have the monetary success that I’d thought I’d have at the age of 52. I’ve never really been able to purchase a big ticket item without a good deal of planning. I don’t have my dream home, or a six figure income. I don’t own a Mercedes; and if I want to buy new living room furniture, I might need to go to Craigslist. However, I’m ok.
When I look at all the people who’ve lost homes due to foreclosure, I’m glad that despite the fact that I’m unemployed, we are still able to afford our mortgage. I am unemployed, but I’m able to contribute to the household bills, go to a movie and treat myself to something special every now and then. Maybe I should forget about the traditional success model and embrace the real side of life and happiness. Like the old folks say, if you’ve got a roof over your head and food to eat, you’re doing alright.
Things aren’t so bad in my life. I completed college about five years ago at the ripe old age of forty seven. I was able to get out of the administrative field and to move into computer support. I am a very good mother and I have raised a son whom any mother would be proud of. I am also blessed because I'm relatively healthy. Success, maybe it’s been right here all along staring me in the face. I guess that life is punctuated by many small, notable successes. By George, I think I’ve got it! Success is getting whatever makes you happy!
Ah, but friends, don’t get it twisted! I still want a nicer home, and a good job, but if I don’t get all that I yearn for, it’s ok. I know that I am responsible for my own happiness, my own success. I can choose to be discouraged, or I can keep it moving. To quote Scarlet O’Hara in Gone with the Wind "After all ... tomorrow is another day." And friends, another day brings with it new opportunities and more chances for happiness and success. What makes you happy? How do you measure success? Tell me your thoughts on the matter. As always, it has been a pleasure. Let’s talk again soon. Ciao!
